The Moments We Miss (And the Moments We Can Choose)

The Moments We Miss (And the Moments We Can Choose)

Most of us mean well. We love our dogs. We want to connect with them. We’re eager to share affection, attention, and time. But here’s something that often happens without us even realizing:

• We offer conversations when they’re not asking.
• We touch when they’re buzzing with overstimulation.
• We chatter when they’re trying to process the world.
• We move fast when their bodies are asking for slow.

It’s not wrong. It’s just… misaligned.

And over time, when we miss enough of the right moments—the ones our dogs are actually offering—we can accidentally start building a relationship that feels busy, reactive, or even disconnected.

The Power of Intentional Moments

Today, I want to share a story that reminded me how powerful it is to notice and choose presence—when it matters most.

On one of our off-leash walks, something small but powerful happened with my dog, Good Morning.

She paused.

She gently lowered herself into the grass, tucked among the tall grass and tilted her face up to soak in the morning sun.

At first, I simply watched.

But then I noticed something more: She kept glancing toward me. Soft, gentle blinks. Her body softened each time our eyes met, like she was quietly inviting me into her moment.

That was my invitation.

Not to call her over. Not to clap or cheer or ask for anything. But to slow down. To move toward her softly. To crouch low, soften my own energy, and simply be there with her.

I spoke to her in a quiet, easy voice. I reached out with slow, light touch—nothing rushed or demanding. And together, we shared a stillness that wasn’t planned, but meant everything.

How Many Moments Are Waiting for Us?

Dogs offer us opportunities for social connection all the time—little invitations that often go unanswered, simply because we don’t think to notice.

 • A pause to sniff the breeze longer than usual.

 • A soft lean into our leg while we are folding laundry.

 • A brief glance back during a walk, asking, “Are you with me?”

 • A stillness that says, “Stay here with me for a second.”

They aren’t asking for a treat. Or a command. Or a performance.They’re asking for presence.

Being Present Means Choosing When (And How) We Engage

Instead of offering energy at random—when we feel like it—it’s powerful to:

 • Slow down and match their moments

 • Notice when they’re open to connection

 • Offer touch, voice, movement when it meets their energy

 • Let stillness be enough sometimes

Not because we’re “training” anything. Not because it’s scheduled enrichment. But because that’s the foundation of social living—the way dogs (and humans) naturally bond when given the space to do it.

Intentional Connection Isn’t About Doing More. It’s About Choosing Better.

One slow breath shared while lying in the sun… One pause in movement to crouch beside your dog and wonder about the same smell…

One soft hand resting without expectation…

Those tiny, often missed moments build a stronger, deeper relationship than a thousand rushed pets or hyped-up “good dogs” at the wrong time.

Final Thought

When Good Morning chose to pause and soak in the sun, I almost missed it. I could have walked right past. I could have called her along. I could have filled the space with noise.

But instead, I chose to listen.

I chose to join her.

And in that small shared breath, we built something bigger.

Our dogs are offering us connection all the time.

The real question is: Are we noticing?

I’ll be talking much more about noticing, choosing, and building real-world connection inside my upcoming online program, Beyond Busy: The Whole Dog Enrichment Program.

Because true enrichment isn’t about keeping our dogs busy.It’s about learning how to be with them, fully, in the ways that matter most.